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Social Anxiety (Spotlight Effect)

Category: Relationships & Communication
Tags: Anxiety, Confidence
  • Definition
  • The Science
  • The Practice
  • Common Pitfalls

Overview

You feel like a spotlight is on you at the party. The truth? Everyone is too busy worrying about their own spotlight.

Definition

The Spotlight Effect is overestimating how much others notice us. Social Anxiety is the chronic fear of this.

The Science

Self-Referential Bias

The Default Mode Network tells a story about 'Me'. We project our internal nervousness onto others' minds.

The Practice

External Focus Shift

  1. Notice the inward turn.
  2. Pivot outward (color of eyes?).
  3. Be curious.
  4. Drop safety behaviors.

Common Pitfalls

  • Drinking to cope (liquid courage).
  • Avoidance.

Key Takeaway

You aren't the main character in anyone else's movie.

The Modern Mindfulness Atlas

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